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Once you have determined how large your wedding party will be you will need to select the people you want in the wedding party. When considering your selections use great care. Although you won't want to hurt anyone's feelings, not everyone will be a good selection as a member of the wedding party. Make your selection from family members and good friends who are very close to you and whom you can rely on for support and assistance if and when it is needed.
Below is a general listing of the members of the wedding party and some of their respective responsibilities. Depending on the level of formality you may not need all members (flower girl, ring bearer, train bearer) and not all members of the wedding party need to be part of the receiving line.
THE MAID AND/OR MATRON OF HONOR
- Assists the bride with a variety of tasks as needed like selecting attire,
shopping, running errands, addressing envelopes, etc.
- Plans or assists in the planning of the bridal shower
- Oversees the bridesmaids with organizing their fittings
- Oversees the bridesmaids on the wedding day
- Pays for her own wedding attire
- Attends the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner
- Assists the bride before and during the ceremony and at the reception
- Holds the brides bouquet (and the groom's ring if there is no ring bearer) during the ceremony
- Acts as witness for the signing of the marriage license
- Is a member of the receiving line (See Receiving Line article)
- Is seated at the head table at the reception
- Assists in mailing wedding announcements after the wedding
THE BEST MAN
- Organizes the groom's bachelor party
- Oversees the ushers/groomsmen with organizing their fittings
- Oversees the ushers/groomsmen on the wedding day
- Pays for his own wedding attire
- Attends the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner
- Transports the groom to the ceremony site
- Sees that the groom is dressed properly and on time
- Assists the groom before and during the ceremony and at the reception
- Brings marriage license to the wedding
- Holds the brides ring if there is no ring bearer
- Acts as witness for the signing of the marriage license
- Transports the newlyweds to the reception if there is no hired driver
- Is seated at the head table during the reception
- Makes the first toast at the reception
- May transport the bride and groom to their hotel
- Coordinates the return of rental tuxedos
THE BRIDESMAIDS
- May assist the bride and maid/matron of honor with tasks as needed
- May assist the maid/matron of honor with planning the bridal shower as needed
- Purchase their own wedding attire
- Attend the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner
- Arrive at the ceremony location at the designated time
- Sometimes participate in the receiving line (See Receiving Line article)
- Are seated at the head table during the reception
THE USHERS/GROOMSMEN
- Assist the best man with the bachelor party
- Pays for their own wedding attire
- Attend the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner
- Arrive at the ceremony location at the designated time
- Distribute programs and maps to guests as they arrive to the ceremony
- Seat the guests at the ceremony
- Unroll the aisle runner or carpet roll (2 ushers/groomsmen)
- Escort the bridesmaids out of the ceremony location after the ceremony
- Direct the guests where to place the wedding gifts
THE FLOWER GIRL(S)
- Usually from 4 to 8 years old
- Parents usually pay for attire
- Attends the ceremony rehearsal and dinner
- Arrives dressed at the ceremony location at designated time
- Carries a basket of rose petals that
she scatters along the aisle before the bride
Note: If scattering of rose petals is not allowed by
the ceremony location perhaps silk petals will be allowed
or she may simply carry a bouquet or a basket of baby roses
or other seasonal flowers.
THE RING BEARER
- Usually from 4 and 8 years old - boy or girl (If girl, usually dressed the
same as flower girl)
- Parents usually pay for attire
- Attends the ceremony rehearsal and dinner
- Arrives dressed at the ceremony location at the designated time
- Carries a satin pillow with the wedding ring(s) - sometimes tied to the pillow with ribbon
- Walks alone or with the flower girl before the bride
THE TRAIN BEARER
- Usually from 4 to 8 years old - boy or girl (If girl, usually dressed the
same as flower girl)
- Parents usually pay for attire
- Attends the ceremony rehearsal and dinner
- Arrives dressed at the ceremony location at the designated time
- Follows the bride down the aisle carrying the bridal gown train
THE MOTHER OF THE BRIDE
- May assist in the selection of the bridal dress and accessories
- May assist in the selection of the attendant's attire
- Assists in preparing the guest list and may assist in addressing the invitations
- Assists in the planning the ceremony and reception
- Purchases her own dress based on the level of formality and color of the wedding
- Arranges accommodations for the bride's out of town guests
- Attends the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner
- Helps the bride keep track of the gifts
- Arrives dressed at the ceremony location at the designated time for photos
- Is the last person seated before the processional begins
- Is the 1st person in the receiving line (See Receiving Line article)
- Is the hostess of the reception - although someone else may be designated as acting hostess
THE FATHER OF THE BRIDE
- Assists in preparing the guest list
- Selects attire that complements the groom's attire
- Attends the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner
- Rides with the bride to the ceremony
- Walks down the aisle with the bride
- May be part of the receiving line (See Receiving Line article)
- Is the host of the reception - although someone else may be designated as acting host
THE GROOM'S PARENTS
- Helps prepare the guest list for the groom's guests
- Selects attire that complements the
occasion
Mother selects attire to complement the mother of the bride's
attire
Father selects attire to complement the groom's attire
- Usually host and hostess of the
rehearsal dinner
(Father may offer toast to the bride at the rehearsal dinner)
- Arrives dressed at the ceremony location at the designated time
- Mother is part of the receiving line (See Receiving Line article)
- Father may be part of the receiving line (See Receiving Line article)
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